Turning Failure Into a Super Power with Adam Jablin

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How do you respond to failure?

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Do you get down to yourself?

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Do you beat yourself up?

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Do you replay your mistakes over and over and over again in your head?

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If so, today's episode of the podcast is going to be particularly valuable for

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you because our special guest Adam Jablin is going to talk to us about how do we

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bounce back from failure and that's coming up next right here on Unshakable Habits.

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The right habits can help you have it all.

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More time, better health, improved relationships, and less stress.

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But most people lack the tools to stick with those habits

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long enough to see results.

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That is about to change.

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Welcome to Unshakable Habits with your host, Stephen Box.

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It's time to take your habits from unsustainable to unshakable.

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Welcome back.

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This is Episode 76 of Unshakable Habits.

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I am your host, Stephen Box.

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And if you are joining us for the first time this week, let me give you a

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quick recap of what has been going on.

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We have Coach Adam Jablin from The Hero Project with us this week.

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And we are talking about personalization.

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All different types of fear.

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So on Monday we learned a little bit about Adam's story, overcoming

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alcoholism and addiction.

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Tuesday we talked about overcoming the fear of change, something that I think a

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lot of us can honestly, easily relate to.

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And then on Wednesday we talked about something that's maybe

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not as commonly talked about, and it is the fear of success.

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And really what that boils down to is.

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Our fear of the unknown and our lack of confidence in our ability to handle it.

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So Adam really gave us some good tips on how to step into that unknown and

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have confidence in your abilities.

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And today we are wrapping up the interview series with Adam by

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talking about the fear of failure.

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And more specifically, how do we bounce back from it?

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Because failure is part of the process.

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It's inevitable.

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We're all going to fail at some point, but the question is, how do you bounce

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back from it, because it can be so easy when we fail for that to become

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a measuring stick moment for us.

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It can be something we constantly revisit and use as proof of

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why we can't move forward.

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So Adam today is going to give us some really great advice

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on how do you move forward.

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How do you bounce back from that failure and keep moving?

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And then tomorrow, I will do a wrap up where I will give you my

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biggest takeaways from this week.

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So make sure you tune back in tomorrow to check that out.

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but Adam.

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Let's get started, man.

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In terms of bouncing back from failure, what is your story?

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first off, I

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know what my goal is.

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I know where I want to go.

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It may not be finely tuned to every detail, but I know where I want to go.

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What happens is that becomes a bump in the road, and it, rather than

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failure, it becomes disappointment.

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And then, it's how fast can I process that disappointment.

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I have a mentor, I have an outside reference to my

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life, that I can share with.

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And when you share something, really from your heart, your

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soul, you cut that in half.

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and he's been through the trenches.

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he knows where the tripwire is.

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He knows where the ditches are.

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he knows where the landmines are.

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he easily redirects me.

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And puts me back on the path.

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failure is really an emotional journey.

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It's how fast can you bounce back?

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And I'm a human.

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There have been some things in my life from being the fat kid to ultra shredded

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to, married to divorce, which was the hardest thing I've ever went through

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to falling in love, to not having that relationship again, to alcohol and drugs

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being my solution to it becoming my problem and living in a life in recovery.

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From being a non believer to a believer, from running a multi million dollar

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family business like an empire, to starting something on my own and

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doing the entrepreneurial journey.

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Okay, I have had many ups and downs, trials and tribulations, but

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if I can really process it, what it really was is, how fast can I

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get over the emotions to regroup?

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and there were times where I had to whine like a baby.

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there were times that I needed therapy, there were times that I could bounce

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back literally like a Rocky Balboa movie, Drago knocked me down and I just bounced

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back up, and I can't really explain to you why each time I had to overcome this

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fear and this failure, it was different.

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I wish I could articulate it.

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It's actually more language of the heart and how it was affecting me

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in my heart, but I never stopped.

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I never stopped.

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So if it was whining, if it was crying, if it was therapy, if it was letting

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go of a relationship, if it was letting go of alcoholism addiction, if it was

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starting something new, whatever it was, I never stopped moving forward.

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one thing that's stood out to me in our conversation

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is that I see when we talk about these three separate ideas, right?

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there's the fear of change in the first place.

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Then there's the fear of, what if I get, so successful that I can't handle it?

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And then ultimately that kind of leads to the fear of failure, right?

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Which is, what happens when I fall on my face?

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And then we talk about this idea of being able to bounce back from it.

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And I think we talk about these as three separate entities, but they

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actually happen simultaneously.

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We like, we actually deal with all these things almost at the same time.

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As you're trying to change, you're moving towards something that's

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an unknown that causes fear.

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And then at the same time, you're going to stumble in the process.

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And then now that causes that fear to kick in.

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So they're always.

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If you allow yourself to be, you're always living in the state of fear of letting

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go of what is, not knowing what the future is, or worrying about stumbling

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and not being able to, to regroup.

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That's

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it.

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there's a very famous, Twilight Zone episode.

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In which this gambler, this notorious gambler, who dies and he goes to the

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good place and he ends up at the Wynn hotel and everything is just, and they

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give him the presidential suite top suite on the floor and he has all these

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tailored suits waiting for him and anything he wants, he gets anything.

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Champagne, Caviar, the women, you name it.

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And he goes down, and he's on the casino floor, and you

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gotta remember, he's a gambler.

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And he can't lose.

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Poker, Blackjack, Roulette.

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He can't lose.

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He never loses.

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And it's a joy ride for a while.

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And then about 20 days, 30 days in, he starts going crazy.

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and calls the head angel over.

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He's listen, I don't belong here.

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I know, but he's what are you talking about?

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He's isn't everything perfect for you?

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He's I don't belong here.

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He's I, everything it's too perfect.

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It's too perfect.

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He's like, what's wrong?

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You win everything.

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You have everything given to you.

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He's that's it.

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There's no juice.

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There's no spice.

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I need to know that I can lose.

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I need it.

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he's like, let's rob a bank.

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Absolutely.

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We will make sure we will have you rob a bank.

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We will make sure that you get away with whatever money you want.

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He's no, he starts screaming at the angel, right?

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He goes, don't you see, I need to know that I can get caught.

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I need, he keeps saying, I need the juice.

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I need the suspense.

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I, and he goes, don't you understand?

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I don't belong here in heaven.

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And the head angel folds his arm and goes, who says you're

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in heaven and starts laughing.

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And you realize he's there.

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meaning if you got everything you wanted, when you want it, how you want

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it, there would be no juice to it.

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There would be no anima.

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There would be no suspense.

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There'd be no reason for life.

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And when you can embrace that story and really put it.

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into your heart, mind, and soul, you'll realize that this whole thing is a gift.

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It's a privilege.

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It's a journey.

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And if you were given everything you wanted, when you wanted

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it, you would have no drive.

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You would have no suspense.

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You would have no reason to love.

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You'd have no reason to, for being.

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I think, for a lot of people, what this really

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comes down to is we need failure.

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in our lives because failure shows us where opportunities are.

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Failure shows us what we really do and don't want.

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If we never fail, if we just always get what we want, at some point, we start

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to actually realize that's not what we wanted at all, but because we've never

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failed, we don't know what we want.

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That's right.

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And what

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you want always changes.

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you could want the most beautiful, blessed, harmonious family, and then you

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have the baby, and you have the wife, or you have the husband, or you have

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your partner, and then you want more.

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what you want is always changing.

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And failure is what shows us where we really want to go.

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this is not a quote from me, but I really love it.

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I've heard many a very successful people say they've never learned

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anything from their successes.

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They learned everything from their failures.

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I will tell you that when people ask me, what is

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your secret to having a very long marriage, that's really great.

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what is it that's allowed you to do that?

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cause I've been married to be 20 years next year.

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Congratulations.

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Thank you.

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And I always say that most of my relationship success.

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is actually due to having a friend who was absolutely horrible in relationships.

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So I watched all the mistakes he made and said, just don't do that.

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And that's literally how I started out over time.

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I, I had my own failures and I learned from them and things like that.

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But a lot of the early success in my relationship literally

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came from watching him fail.

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That's great.

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yeah, so even though it wasn't my failure, we can all still learn from failures.

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Yeah.

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Yeah, I believe there's some famous quote, that a wise man

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learns from other people's mistakes.

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So final piece of advice that you would give people around just

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the overall topic of fear, like just, it doesn't have to be about a specific

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aspect of fear, but just someone who's just dealing with this fear

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right now and it's holding them back.

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What is the advice that you give them?

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Okay.

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Truly inventory it, like truly take an inventory of what it is.

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Look at it.

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Share it with somebody that you trust.

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Cut it in half.

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And then learn to dance with it, get exposure to it.

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When somebody has a fear of snakes, they, they do exposure therapy.

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They let them first start holding a very small garden snake.

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same thing with flying.

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It's exposure therapy, but it's a process.

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And I think that's something that I would want to share with everybody.

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Getting over fear, getting to your goals and dreams, building the body

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you want, building the business you want, building the marriage

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you want, all of it is a process.

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It is not that Twilight Zone episode.

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You don't wake up one day and it's all bestowed on you.

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So learn to dance and enjoy with the process.

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I

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think that's a great advice, man.

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tomorrow I'm going to, do a recap episode and I'm going to really talk about some

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of the takeaways I've had after I've had a little bit of time to process,

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some of this conversation myself.

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but that's definitely going to be on my, my takeaway list.

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So definitely appreciate that.

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Adam, thank you so much for being here today.

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If someone wants to get in touch with you, wants to work with you, what's

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the best way for them to follow you or get in contact with you?

Adam Jablin: 00:12:31

Yeah, I'm 47 years old, so I made it easy for myself.

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It's Adam Jablin on every platform.

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It's adamJablin.

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com, Adam Jablin on Instagram, Adam Jablin on Facebook.

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Tik Tok, whatever it is, it's just Adam Jablin that's where

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you can find the Hero Project.

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That's where you can find my speaking and my events.

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That's where you can find what I'm up to.

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That's where you can find my coaching programs.

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That's where you can find resources, like the Hero 7.

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Adam Jablin.

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Appreciate it, Adam.

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Thank you very much.

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Thank you for being here all week long and providing such great insights.

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Guys, highly encourage you to touch base with Adam as well.

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I will have a link to his website in the show notes so that way

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you can find him everywhere.

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Tomorrow, I'm going to have my recap episode, which will give you my big

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takeaways from the week, and I will maybe share some personal insights or

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stories of things that came up for me while doing this interview with Adam.

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But until then, I remind you as always, guys, that while none of us are born

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unshakable, we can all become unshakable.